i will not call the insurance company....

I am using my "I will not call the insurance company to see if I am approved for surgery" as a tool to get my house in order. I refuse to call them today...even though I am trying to find every excuse to call them...HA...so  I am cleaning. Cleaning like a mad women to keep my mind off things. I am just going crazy. 

I am seriously completely behind on school work because my mind is just not in it, it is totally in "will I be approved for surgery?" I haven't finished LAST weeks notes, let alone start this weeks...I haven't been into class at all, and I haven't even looked at what assignments are due and when! How bad is that? I know everyone is that is reading this probably thinks I am crazy for letting myself get this overcome with fears that I am going to be denied for surgery, but I just can't help it. I worked so hard for all this and I just want it that bad. 

I go for my pre-op appointment on Friday. I am excited...the only thing I am not exciting about is driving there by myself. I hate the location of the hospital I am going to be in, and this is going to be the first time I drive near there completely by myself (of course with Xavier in the car...which makes me even more nervous.) I just want to hear "approved" so I can get on with my life. 

I totally want to be able to relax this weekend because next weekend would be the weekend before surgery and there is no way I am doing any relaxing then. I just hope I hear something soon....really soon....before they have to commit me...then I am sure they won't approve me! AHHHH......! 

Okay, Let me get on with this cleaning and hopefully I will hear something...or else I am going to have the cleanest house in the world....and that will not be a bad thing!